Don't Overthink
by The Wandering Swordsman
Summary: Always trust your first instincts. Unfortunately, Usopp didn't. LuffyxZoro.


**Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.**

Usopp was sewing up a large, black piece of fabric. It was for his upgraded version of his Usopp Hammer; he planned to have it labeled to twenty tons. Since it was going to be twenty tons, the sewing took him a long time to complete. He spent over three hours sewing one side, and realized he couldn't do it anymore. His shoulders were screaming for rest and his fingers rejected to thread it into a needle hole. Finally, when his five minute breaks were longer than the expected time, he decided to call it quits.

"Arrg, I need a nap." Usopp groaned as he threw his arms above his head. The stretch felt good after being in a bad position for a long time. A yawn escaped from his lips, he trudged his way to the men's dormitory.

Coming up with a daydream so he could easily fall asleep the moment he hit the bed, his senses picked up a sound. A certain sound. The sound that brought tingles down one's spine and a flush across cheeks. Someone was making a lot of noise in the men's dormitory, and it was loud.

Usopp blushed because he recognized the voice. It was Zoro. What the hell was he doing in the room? He was curious, but at the same time extremely afraid to know what he was going to see. His walk slowed to a tip-toe as he made his way to the door. He pressed his ear against the wooden surface to make sure he wasn't delirious.

He wasn't.

It was Zoro alright. And the one who was making him produce these strange, arousing sounds was-to Usopp's surprise-Luffy. Harsh, fast squeaks rhythmically played in sync with Zoro's throaty moans. So, they were probably doing something on the bed.

But what?

Usopp visually held out a stop sign before thinking any further. Calm down Usopp, calm down. Mushrooms and Kokoro's panties; there, now he was all calm and not flustered.

If he took a step back to rationalize, he wouldn't jump to conclusions. If he had jumped to conclusions and barged into the door to find out they were just playing, it would be Usopp who would leave the room embarrassed. There were many different situations other than _that_. The activities his crewmates were doing beyond this door might be very innocent. Perhaps they were wrestling on the bed. Usopp did that before with Onion, Peppers, and Carrot. It was softer to wrestle than on the floor. He pressed his ears to prove his point.

"Unn'ha, ah! L-Luffy, not there-! H-Here...! P-please, luf-aaah!"

He quickly drew his ears away from the door.

Whoa.

Mushroom and Kokoro's panties. Mushrooms and Kokoro's panties. Mushroom patterns on Kokoro's panties.

Okay, his heart slowed down. It did not skip a beat at Zoro's sultry moans. Not a bit.

That didn't really sound like they were wresting, but there were other options. Usopp prodded his mind, and the answer was retrieved: a massage. Yes, the activity that most people take it as a misunderstanding. It made perfect sense why Zoro was asking Luffy to do it certain places. The rhythmic thumps against the bed also made sense too. Poor Zoro, Luffy must be terrible at giving massages on how loud the bed was creaking. Usopp noted to teach Luffy that massage was about the right placement over strength.

He pressed his ears against the door again, and he gave slow nods.

"Ohh! T-That's good Luffy-! Mmf, so good-!" The squeaks of the bed were increasing in volume and speed. Zoro's moans were escalating in voice, as well as a wide range of pitch.

Although it still sounded lewd-and it made a certain part of Usopp's body sore-Usopp liked his hypothesis. Luffy was giving Zoro a massage. See? If he thought it over carefully, people wouldn't accuse others to have dirty minds. Usopp was going to enter the room to see the massaging process, and he would politely ask if Zoro would keep his voice down, so he could take a good long nap.

Usopp stood up, turned the doorknob, and walked in.

"Hey guys, having a good massage? I'm going to take a nap, so can you quiet down a l-l-l-little...?" Slowly, Usopp took in every image and detail of the situation. His eyes widened so much that his eyeballs would've fell off his sockets. Yes, Luffy and Zoro were on the bed. Sadly, that was the only one he was correct on.

Luffy was laying on the bed with Zoro straddling on his groin. Underwear, boots, sandals, socks, and pants scatted all around Luffy's bed. Luffy's hand gripped tightly around the swordsman's hips, while the other was thumbing over the hardened member. Zoro was flushed and looked like he was lost in heaven because his eye was heavily glazed. He probably didn't realize there was an intruder because he leaned down toward Luffy and asked why he had stopped.

The captain leaned over to the side to give eye contact with Usopp, "What did you say Usopp?"

Usopp recalled sputtering a sentence that sounded like "I'm sorry to interrupt your guy's time. Carry on. I didn't see anything. Nope. Nope. Nope," and ran out like a startled cat.

From that day on, Usopp decided to believe on his first instincts.

**The End**


End file.
